Look links! omg!
Chapter 1: http://www.fanfiction.net/secure/live_prev...6&chapter=1
Chapter 2: http://www.fanfiction.net/secure/live_prev...8&chapter=1
CHAPTER 3! [FINAL CHAPTER]
Omg guys final chapter. Get ur diapers ready Cuz i hope this makes u pee ur panties!
K where were we.... It HAS been a while.....Oh yes I remember!
Itachi: Give us your boob monkies! Or face destruction of da village!
Tsunade: No! DONT U DARE GIVE IT TO HIM! HE WILL DESTROY KONOHA!
Itachi: We'll I was actually gonna use them in this new Circus I'm hosting with Kisame.... But your idea is sexy!
Shizune: TSUNADE SAMA!!!!!
Tenten: BUAHAHAHAHAHAH! IT IS FINALLY TIME FOR THE 1337 H4X0RZ TO RULE ONCE AGAIN!
Kisame: Omg so hot so hot! Im in luvvv <3
Tenten: Get in line fan boyzzz!
Kisame: OMG TENTEN TALKED 2 ME! *faints*
Sasuke: Tenten u NERDY WHORE! I KNEW ALL THIS MYSPACE + MSN + FACEBOOK WAS DESTROYING YOUR LIFE!
Itachi: Don't forget her online dating chatrooms!
Tenten: Shhh! Ur gonna ruin my RELATIONSHIPS!
Sasuke: If you want these jugs, your gonna have to BEAT THE WHOLE VILLAGE!
Tenten: NOT the WHOLLEEEE VILLAGE! Buahahahh! IM not the only Undercover spy!
Sasuke: OMG! IS IT TSUNADE?
Tenten: No.
Sasuke: SAKURA?
Tenten: No.
Sasuke: GAI SENSEI?
Tenten: No.
Sasuke: ZABUZA?
Tenten: Hes not from the village! and hes dead too...
Sasuke: HAKU?
Tenten: OMG STFU LET ME FINISH MA SENTENCE!
Sasuke: THAT GUY FROM THE FILLERS WITH THE LIGHTNING SWORDS?
Tenten: Its........ DUNNN DUNNN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Shizune: ME!
Tenten: YUP! SHIZUNE WAS THE UNDERCOVER SPY!
Tsunade: YOU MOOCHING WHORE! U LIED TO ME FOR LIKE..... 60 YEARS!
Shizune: All those times I was shouting TSUNADE SAMA, it was a diversion while I was secretly planning my Secret evil plan...
Sasuke: K U have a single digit IQ! U cud NEVER PULL SOMETHING OFF LIKE DIS!
Shizune: HEY! Though that may be true, but there was a secret to my evilness!
Tsunade: Omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg.... NOT THAT
Shizune: TEXT MESSAGING!
Tenten: Dats rite dats rite!
Shizune: They make the words smaller and easier to understand!
Tsunade: DAMN YOU UNLIMITED LOCAL TEXTING AFTER 6 PM!!!!! DAMN YOUU!!!!
Sasuke: K, the ninjas are gonna come and PWN YOU! So u might as well give up nao!
Kisame: Nebar! Lets go outside, more room to stare at Tentens as- I mean her.......
Tenten: -slap- lets go outside y'all! I cant take the skanky smell in here!
Sasuke: Lol Tsunade farted!
Everyone: AHAHAHAHAHAHA!
*outside*
Tenten: Omg Sasuke U tell the funniest jokes! But now we have to kill you
Sasuke: Thats understandable, its a SHAME too! I have KILLER knock knock jokes!
Tenten: Omg tell one tell one!
Sasuke: Knock knock
Tenten: Whos there?
Sasuke: Won chu!
Tenten: OMG GTFO! NO AZNS IN MY HOUSE!
Sasuke: Just say 'Won Chu who'?
Tenten: Won Chu who?
Sasuke: Won Chu go GTFO and fall down a well filled with spikes and child molesters and live there for the rest of your life with genital warts and Hemorrhoids?
Tenten: .... I dont get it......
*20 mins later*
Tenten: OMG U BSTRD! THATS SO HURTFUL! AKATSUKI ATTACK!
Naruto: Hey yall! Wats goin awnn!!!?? Me and the team were here looking for villagers to harass
Sasuke: YO NARUTO U GUYS GET ITACHI!
Kakashi: OMG! its like that last fight we had! Except it was a stupid fake guy, which was totally lame.
Sakura: K I've called Gai's team to come over and kill Kisame!
Sai: Shut up, mini bewbs
Sakura: WHY DONT YOU LOVE ME! *cries*
Gai: ANUS SAUCE! WE'RE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lee: THIS TIME WE WILL KICK YOUR BLUE BALLS ALL THE WAY TO LOTUS CAPS-LOCK LAND!
Neji: OMG TENTEN U BETRAYER! U CANT DO THAT! IT DEFIES YOUR FRIGGIN DESTINY!
Tenten: Screw destiny, Screw you, and Screw powdered mashed potatoes (they're really nasty)!
Lee: WE CANT DO THIS WITHOUT YOU TENTEN!
Neji: K remember last time? All she did was throw that stupid toy at him. And she almost drowned too....SOOo closeee! SHES USELESS!
Tenten: Not to mention I had to get a new Cell phone CUZ THE LAST ONE GOT WET! and add all my contacts back again and redownload all my songs and crap!
Gai: I DONT KNOW ABOUT THIS TECK-KNOW-LOW-GEE YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT! THE ONLY LANGUAGE I KNOW IS KICKASSNESE!
Naruto: Is that a European language?
Sasuke: Fight freakin fruity faggy faggots!
*COOL COMBAT SCENE WHICH U CANT SEE CUZ ITS TOO EPIC! and partially because this is a fanfic*
*Team KAKASHI V.s. ITACHI*
Itachi: K im gonna PWN YOU SO EASILY!
Naruto: OH NO YOU DONT! ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS LOOK AWAY FROM HIS EYES AND HIS RIN- OH DAMMIT!
Itachi: LOL U LOOKED AT MY RING AGAIN!
Sakura: Why is naruto naked and licking Itachi's dingaloo?
Kakashi: OMG ITACHI'S ILLUSIONS HAVE BECOME PERVERTED! HE SHUDDA STAYED AWAY FROM THE YAOI FCS! WHYYY!!!
Sai: Smack em on the head!
Sakura: HULK SMASH! *boom*
Naruto: Where am I?..... OMFG ASDHJASHDJASKHDASKHDk;ASD!!!
Itachi: Lol.... This gives more traumatization than the stupid 72 hour bs.
Kakashi: Omg plz do the 72 hour thing to me if ur gonna do a genjutsu. PLZZZ
Naruto: AHHHH!!! IM LEAVINGGGG!!!!! *cries*
*naruto out*
Sai: Let me draw stuff. *draws Mona Lisa* NINPO CHOUJUU GIGAAA!
Kakashi: OMG THE MONA LISA IS ALIVEEE!!!
Mona Lisa: RAWRRR!!!! MUST EAT FLESH!!!
itachi: AHHH!! I CANT HURT A PIECE OF BRILLIANT ART!
*Mona Lisa bites Itachi*
Itachi: AHHHHHH!!!!
Kakashi: Nows our chance mini boobs! HIT EM HARD!
Sakura: FALCON.... PAWNNCHHH!!!!
Kakashi: CHIDORI!!!!
*boom*
Sai: Omg we did it! We killed Itachi and it was soo easyyy!
Sakura: YAY GOOD JOB TEAM WE DID IT!
Kakashi: What did I say about talking?
Sakura: *sigh* Talking is for girls who have boobs
Kakashi: Dam straight
*Gai's fight*
Gai: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?
Kisame: Um... We just met like 2 weeks ago...
Gai: OMG HAKU?
Kisame: HOW THE HELL WOULD U KNOW HAKU? OMG UR RETARDED!
Gai: Hmm We'll lets see... You're blue.... That narrows it down to like 40000 ppl
Kisame: (<_<)
Lee: ATTACK!
Kisame: *takes out his Popsicle sword*
Neji: Omg its the furry Popsicle of doom!
Gai: WHOA THATS SUCH A COOL WEAPON! WHY HAVENT I SEEN IT B4!?
Kisame: Omg STFU! *slash*
Gai: OMGFFDGFG U CUT OFF MY ARM WITH UR POPSICLE!
Lee: ITS OK GAI SENSEI I HAVE IT! IL PUT IT IN MY EYEBROWS FOR STORAGE!
Neji: 64 PALMS TRIGRAM THINGY THING!
Kisame: OH CRAP!
Neji: 2 POINTS! 4 POINTS! 8 POINTS! 12 POINTS? 29 POINTS?!?! Umm....55.4 POINTS? DAM I LOST COUNT! 2 POINTS! 4 POINTS! 7 POINTS?! -6456543 POINTS? DAM LOST COUNT!
Kisame: Do it right or dont do it at all!
Lee: AFTER NEJI WENT TO BLONDE CAMP, HE HAS NEVER BEEN THE SAME. HE USED TO BE A GENIUS!
Kisame: *slashes Neji's head off*
*Neji out*
Neji fangirls: OMFG U IDIOT! WTF DID U DO OMG OGMO GOMO GMOGMODMGSGFGDF!
Kisame: Sry the only girls I care about are named Tenten
Gai: LEE KILL HIM! I DONT HAVE AN ARM SO I CANT FIGHT!
Lee: *throws off weights* *throws off backpacks* *throws off throwing knives* *throws off clothes*
Gai: LEE! DID U FORGET ABOUT THE DRESS CODE?
Lee: THIS IS MY WAY OF THE NINJA!
Tenten: LOL THEY SHUD NOT ONLY CALL HIM FUZZY BROWS BUT FUZZY *****!
Gai: TENTEN.......GET OUT OF HERE U DIRTY LIL HOE!
Tenten: NEBA! I OWN THIS SERVER!
Kisame: Tenten I LOVE YOU!
TentenXKisame FC members: ..... ( Oh yah there are none)
Tenten: I DONT LOVE YOU KISAME!
Kisame: *tear* *tear* But I let u lick my popsicle!
Tenten: It cut my tongue into 4 pieces
Kisame: WHY DONT U LOVE ME!
Lee: TOO SLOW! *kicks Kisame's Popsicle into his face shattering his head into a bloody mushy mess kind of like a pinata filled with guts*
Tenten: LAWLS WHO WANTS SUSHI? *takes a piece of dead Kisame, wraps him in rice and eats*
Gai: COME ON GUYS! ITS A DISH BEST SERVED RAW!
Tsunade: WELL WELL WELL! ITS JUST YOU AND SHIZUNE!
Sasuke: We're gonna OWN YOU!
Tenten: Godmode.exe RUN!
Tsunade: OMG SHES USING HAX! RUN!!!
Sasuke: NO! I MUST FIGHT HER!
Shizune: BUAHAHAHA TENTEN SAMA IS RULER OF EVERYTHING!
Sasuke: I CANT HURT HER! SHE HAS GOD MODE ON!
Tenten: I'm teh 1337 uber ninja. NOTHING CAN STOP ME!
Tsunade: HOLY crap girl speak English! Save your Spanish for Mexico
Tenten: Superuberlazer.exe RUN!
Tsunade: Oh Sh-
Tenten: IMA FIRE MA LAZER!
*BOOM*
Tsunade: OMG she blew off half my head!
Tenten: Its only a matter of time before YOU DIE!
Tsunade: BEFORE I DIE.... SASUKE I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU!!
Sasuke: Yesh?
Tsunade: Come closer!
Sasuke: K?
Tsunade: CLOSER!
Sasuke: now?
Tsunade: CLOSER!!!!
Sasuke: my ears are touching whats left of your lips...
Tsunade: OWN THAT B****! *dies*
*TSUNADE OUT!*
Sasuke: Famous last words.....
Tsunade fanboys: Can we keep the body?
Orochimaru: HEY CUTIES! ISNT IT A FAAABBUULOUSS DAY?
Kabuto: IM JUST AN ANUS FULL OF LOVE AND HAPPINESS!
*looks at dead bodies*
Orochimaru: What a mess!!!! Those Blood stains DO NOT match the brain stains!
Kabuto: I KNOW! And the Intestines CLASH with the severed blood vessels
Sasuke: Hey gaybos I need your help in beatin these gals....and shizune
Shizune: HEY!
Kabuto: NO PROBLEM! LEAVE IT TO ME!
Orochimaru: Woohoo! FIGHTING TIME!
Sasuke: She has GOD MODE on guys... shes invincible
Orochimaru: Pshhh I've dealt with God mode before..... Back in my day, it was THE BIGGEST FAD! If u didnt have it, the kids made fun of you and said you were gay!
Sasuke: So u didnt have it?
Orochimaru: Oh I got it.... They still called me gay tho... it might have been that one bathroom experience back in 3rd grade...
Kabuto: OH DO TELL!
Sasuke: Oh DO NOT TELL PLZ!
Orochimaru: Well, the secret to defeating God mode is to destroy the stuff ur opponent loves the most!
Sasuke: Tenten do u like puppies? *breaks puppies neck*
Tenten: No
Kabuto: Rabbits? *breaks rabbits neck*
Tenten: Allergies
Orochimaru: Little children? *breaks child's neck*
Tenten: That kid spammed my chatroom.
Sasuke: THATS IT! HER TECHNOLOGY!
Gai: WATS TECK-KNOW-LOW-GEE?
Kabuto: *kicks Gai off a really really tall mountain*
*GAI OUT*
Sasuke: LETS TRASH HER STUFF!
Orochimaru: TO TENTENS HOUSE!
*10-10 lair*
Sasuke: GAMEBOY! *crush* GAMEBOY ADVANCE! *crush* GAMEBOY ADVANCE SP! *crush* TENTEN'S MOTHER *crush*
Tenten: YOU CAN BREAK MY MOTHER, BUT YOU CAN NOT! I SAY NOT! BREAK MY LIMITED EDITION GAMEBOY COLOUR!
Sasuke: Oh i didnt break that, Orochimaru has it.
Orochimaru: *crush* oops
Kabuto: Laptop *eats* CPUs *eats* Mice (Not the nasty rodent kind) *eats* Mice (the nasty rodent kind) *eats*
Sasuke: LOLS Kabuto ur gonna have a power surge.
Kabuto: *farts* HEY look I just farted out a keyboard! SCORE!
Orochimaru: Facebook profile *delete* myspace profile *delete* Msn/Yahoo/AIM accounts *deleted* Lava life online dating service account *deleted*
Tenten: NO!!!!!! NOT MY LAVA LIFE!!!!!!
Sasuke: AND THE FINAL PIECE OF VITAL TECHNOLOGY!
Tenten: DONT DO IT!
Sasuke: *takes cell phone from Tenten*
Tenten: PLEASE DONT DO IT! ANYTHING BUT MY CELL PHONE!!! PLEASEE!!!!
Sasuke: *smirk*
Tenten: IL DO ANYTHING! PLEASEEEEE!!!!! PLEASEE PLEASEE!!!!!
Sasuke: Gimme 10 thousand dollars
Tenten: *gives 10 thousand dollars*
Sasuke: *Crushes phone and sprinkles crumbs on top of tenten's head*
Tenten: HDUIASHDLIASDHUIASLHDASIDLHASIDLHUISAHDILAHSIDLADAHSDHLSHUDLAHILHDIUHUL!!!!!
Sasuke: AND I made 10 grand!
Tenten: AJDIASIJDLASHDIHSADLIASHDIUASHIDLAHSIDHIASUHDILASIDHUASIHDIL!!!!!!
Orochimaru: Looks like Tenten has an overload!
Kabuto: RUNNN!!!!! *takes TV and smashes it on the way out*
Tenten: *EXPLODES*
*TENTEN OUT*
Sasuke: AND THATS WHAT TECHNOLOGY DOES TO YOU FOLKS!
Orochimaru: WE KILLED HER! I GUESS THE STORY HAS COME TO AN END!
Kabuto: THANK GOODNESS! This has been such a long FANFIC!
Shizune: I think you've forgotten someone...
Orochimaru: Who, Haku?
Shizune: ME DAMMIT!
Kabuto: And you are....
Orochimaru: OHH I THINK ITS ONE OF THEM POKEMONS!
Shizune: NO! IM AN ELITE NINJA! AND IM GONAN KILLZ YUU
Sasuke: Right.. .We killed your stupid leader Tenten, Now go away
Shizune: All these years I have been holding a pig and running around shouting TSUNADE SAMA! Well now my time has come! TO RECLAIM MY NAME!
Orochimaru: Haku is that REALLY YOU?
Shizune: BEHOLD! THIS IS TONTON THE PIG! AKA MY SECRET WEAPON!
Sasuke: The cute widdle piggy?
Shizune: For 5 YEARS I HAVE BEEN FEEDING THIS PIG KOREAN BBQ! HE HAS A HUGE BUILD UP OF GAS THAT WILL DESTROY THE VILLAGE!
Kabuto: Notice how everything destroys the village now... Like srsly...
Shizune: IMA DO IT! IM CRAZY!
Kabuto: Shes gonna do it.... NOO!!!
Sasuke: DONT DO IT!!!!!
Orochimaru: LETS JUST HOLD HANDS AND HUG!
Shizune: TOO LATE! I WILL AVENGE YOU TENTEN!
Sasuke: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOO! *hi*
Shizune: TSUNADE SAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOM*
*sizzle sizzle pop pop*
*lots of gas stuff + the crappy mist*
Sasuke: YO IM STILL ALIVE!
Orochimaru: ME TOO! cept it smells like pig crap
Kabuto: WHAT HAPPENED?
Golden monkey: I HAVE SAVED YOU ALL!
Sasuke: WHO ARE YOU?
Golden monkey: I AM THE MONKEY THAT WAS IN UR BOOB THE WHOLE TIME
Sasuke: COOL! whats ur name?
Golden monkey: Tim
Sasuke: HI TIM!
Tim: Hi sasuke
Shizune: HOW THE HELL DID U STOP THE ATTACK?
Tim: I jumped out of Sasuke's breasts and shuved a cork up your pigs butt, and he exploded
Shizune: Oh DAYUMMMM
Sasuke: HEY IM FLAT CHESTED AGAIN!
Sakura: Join the flat chested FC!
Everyone: STFU SAKURA
Tim: Thank you for taking care of me young padawan, I owe you my thanks
Sasuke: OROCHIMARU CAN I KEEP IT! ITS SOOO CUTEEE
Orochimaru: NO! SNAKES FTW!
Kabuto: SNAKES > GOLDEN MONKIES!
Sasuke: BUT ITS MINE! I GAVE BIRTH TO IT!
Orochimaru: You know the old saying? "If you love your golden breast monkey, you have to set it free" Albert Einstein
Sasuke: I'm gonna miss you Tim... Where are you gonna go?
Tim: I plan to start a life here in Konoha, get a girl pregnant and leave to the next village
Sasuke: SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN!
Tim: BAIIISSS!!!!!
Sasuke: BYE! I guess we have to return to the hideout
Kakashi: Can u reconsider staying?
Sasuke: Hmm.... Nope bye!
Orochimaru: TATA MY HOMIES! IM GONNA MISS YUSSS!!
*back at the hideout*
Sasuke: The moral of the story is to ALWAYS TRUST YOUR FRIENDS IN TIMES OF NEED, and to ALWAYS READ THE INGREDIENTS BEFORE YOU EAT!
Kabuto: Sasuke want instant noodles?
Sasuke: Sure!
Shizune: TSUNADEEEE SAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Everyone: *kicks Shizune into a well full of herpes"
*THE END!*
Epiloge: Everyone died.
Naruto became traumatized for life and drowned himself.
Ino developed an STD
Shikamaru went blind due to eyes being too small
Chouji, mistaken for hot air balloon and ended up being burnt.
Shino got a lethal monsquito bite
Kiba got heart worms
Hinata blushed so hard blood shot out of her face
Lee, killer eyebrow lice
Gai, suicide after loss of Lee
Sakura, is now used to play tetris
Sai, suicide after losing people to make fun of
kakashi, suffication
Kurenai, AIDS DUH!!!
Asuma, DRUG OVERDOSE!
Orochimaru, married Kabuto and moved into a house in Miami where he developed AIDS (Anus internal drunk skank)
Sasuke used his 10 grand to start a business selling cheeseburgers which became a successful business called Mcsasuke's, it is currently known as McDonalds.
and who can forget, Haku, who died proudly trying to fly across Konoha.
HOPED U LIKED MY FIRST FANFIC! I LOVE YOU GUYS!
I MIGHT MAKE A NEW SERIES! WITH SAME CHARACTERS OMG! NO WAI!!!
IL FINK BOUT IT DO!
HOPE U ENJOYED IT!
I promise
anyways I promise I'll have chapter 2 up by today. If i don't then you have the right to slap me.